A letter to you…

Dear Brother,

This letter may come to sound weird and you may even ask me, ‘What I need?’ (Like you did when the only time I called you ‘anna’ after getting a lecture from an uncle on why I call you by name 😉 ). Well I don’t need anything, as amma and you have given me much more than anything I would ever need. Appaji is someone who is inherently in us all the time. But today I write you this letter to say thank you, rather express as I would never tell you this in person and neither would you take me seriously if I ever did. I know you’d say, you didn’t have too and you knew but I wanted too. So here it goes.

Thanks to amma and appaji to have brought us up with such wonderful values and always been an inspiration to be better human beings than anything else. But thank you for always, silently giving me all the love, support and care. Treating me as an equal and listening (irritated or to just amuse me) to all the opinions I had about everything we spoke about, whether it was asked or not. For always making sure to show me that I had a voice, I had a say in any important decisions, that was to be made at home or in your life. It’s more than in one way, moulded me to be this confident, young woman I am today and to take the reins of my life, riding it in the direction I wish to take it in. Being proud of who I was and taking pride in telling people about me. It made me stronger of who I was and happy knowing you were proud of me. Never once throwing at me, ‘you are a girl’ logic on anything that I did or wanted to do, but always had a practical logic to throw at me.

I am proud to have a brother like you, more so I feel blessed to have you. I watch you everyday, noticing the little joys and the big worries that you go through, making me smile knowing, how much you can say to the people around you without using any words. Someimes I see you as the brother of a younger age, as I looked over to see if you were there and the innocence doesn’t seem to have diminished, the love you have for people around you, soo pure and straightforward but unspoken. Your dedication to work or your loved one is commendable, know that you have great heights to conquer and your hardwork will soon lead you to success. There sure are and will be elements and people in your life who will try to pull you back, put you down but move ahead, as you are beyond them for the sole reason that you won’t treat anyone bad no matter what they do to you. It’s a quality I adore and something that makes all of us, very protective about you. Move ahead, the treasure is right there, don’t give up and don’t give in.

You are a wonderful father, I see it as you play with the kiddo everyday or look at him. I at times, see appaji as you talk or amuse him and know appaji is as much in you as in me, always reminding us of it as we look at eachother. When I chose a partner for my life, I appreciate how you took time to know him, understand him and fully accepted him when you felt it, genuinely. This was way better than you doing it for my sake, but taking time to ensure the emotions were real. I see you and amma, work tirelessly now to give us a great wedding, I want you to know how happy it makes us feel and thankful for all the thought, hardwork you two put in.

You truly are an example for every brother out there, of how they could treat their sister equally, respect her and more so encourage her to have a voice of her own, to be herself and achieve a lot more. I do wish one other thing, that you worry less and enjoy ‘today’ and ‘now’ much more, because things will work out but the moments lost may never come back. Look after yourself too as much as you want to look after others, you need to be good to do good for others. Lastly, know that we are proud of you, of everything you have done, achieved and the dream you are working towards. We are with you.

Lovingly,

Your obnoxious opinionated sister 😉

I wish you were here…

 

IMG_20160615_185859.jpgDearest Appaji,

How are you? It’s been a while since I have been thinking of writing this letter to you. I know it’s quite unnecessary as I talk to you almost everyday and it is weird am writing it in English and not in Kannada, sorry about that. Maybe someday I shall learn to and yes start to read kannada books too. 🙂 I am sure you would have made good friends there, discussing books, literature and us. We miss you as much too and know you are always around us, looking after and guiding us through.

There is soo much I want to tell you appaji but more so want to hear you back. It’s been soo long but it seems like yesterday, you went on to make new friends in another world but with an assurance to be around us always. Thank you for always being around. I am to step into a new journey in my life and I can’t tell you how much I wish you were here. In real. I want to tell you, how thankful I am for this life and how happy, proud I am to have been born as your daughter. It’s amma and you, because of whom I am the way I am. Not blaming you two for how stubborn and irritatingly outspoken I am at times ;), but for the confident, independent woman that I am today and with the ideals, principles I have inbuilt in me.

You have taught me soo much appaji and continue to do so even now, like a guardian angel who stands over and applauds for every success of mine, picking me up every time I fall down. The way you introduced me to books, stories, words and eased their existence into my life making them such a strong part of me. You showed me how important family, relationships are by not really saying it out but showing it in each of your actions. As I watched you read, speak passionately about a subject or hear you giving a speech, I realized the power of words, of a person and how they could inspire someone, change something. How humility and kindness are two wonderful traits a person could have. By being an amazing father, you taught how to love children and I think of you as I play with adith. How we could teach him everything but not really telling it but by showing it and being all that ourselves.

This new phase of life is around the corner and I wish you were here to celebrate it, enjoy it and not to forget, take all my tantrums that amma takes it now. Things would have been different know appaji, were you here. I am sorry we aren’t taking care of your wife as well as you did. We love her as much but just give away our childishness at times. I wish you could meet ‘him’ appaji. Am sure you would have loved ‘him’ and happily given me away, knowing he loved and cherished me as much. But you know am a bit glad you can’t give me away because I am going to take me with you. Would you be there all the time during all these functions and everything that is going to happen, holding my hand and maybe laughing at me for all the things I would be made? Also ganging up with amma as she teases me on everything? Would you support me as I fight to get my way in things? I remember as a kid, I would play this game, where it would be like I am leaving and hug you tight enacting to cry and say bye(yes. All the time we had guests at home in hubli, this is why I hugged you 😉 ) Would you tell me this time that all of you are coming with me and am not leaving anywhere?

Am sure you will. I love you appaji, more than I can ever say to you or to anyone else. I shall always be the kid who loves to cuddle up on her father’s tummy and hear it make all sorts of noise. I am excited about this new journey appaji. Stay with me…

Lovingingly,

Motu..

Finding my way back to writing…

Everyday just catches up with you doesn’t it? Day in and day out.. The same work, same things to do, like a never ending routine. There sure are moments when a smile appears
on your face out of nowhere as you hear a song that touches or watch a bird fly across the sky or as you breath in the wet smell of rain with a gentle breeze caressing your face. You close your eyes and remember.. the dreams you wait for to come true, the things you let go, the friends you miss having around and wonder as you slowly move back to reality, where is that girl or the guy I am and who is this now!
The society,  the world that pushes you to be normal because that’s the way it should be. The way you are meant to do things or take certain roads that lead to nowhere but you sure to go that way,  because hey that’s where the world is going right? Respect, responsibilities  and everything that you may not care off. There sure are times, when ‘The You’ comes out and the world seems like a beautiful place. You feel it in everything you do and the boundless joy you feel. But then lost again, confused again. What are you to do?
I would say love yourself, spend time yourself and let nobody take away your smile, because nobody can stop you from being happy unless you let them….

What about the ones you love? Well.. What about the ones you love…..

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Sir, you’ll continue to stay in us…

You cannot change your future, but you can change your habits and surely your habits will change your future – APJ Abdul Kalam

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There are only a few leaders in the world, who have this innate charm to make you sit straight and listen, also inspire you without you knowing the effect, they have on you. APJ Abdul Kalam is one such leader. I still remember when he was the President of India and how proud I was of the fact and ensured to speak about him, every chance I got. Only a few in the political field have the ability to become leaders through intellect and personality, APJ is one among these. His iconic hairstyle and the smile will never fade away from our memory. His infectious enthusiasm and keenness to connect with the youth will never be forgotten. He’ll remain in our hearts and keep inspiring us to be better, to build a better India and to create a wonderful world. Sir, you showed us what hardwork, innovation can change and also it’s the small lessons in life that matter and make who you are. You were a true visionary.

You will always be in our thoughts, our talks and be an inspiration to millions. Thank you for playing a prominent role in the development of India. My only regret is to not have met you or heard you speak in real. We’ll miss you…

I am proud of who i am – A WOMAN

download     I write this with a deep sense of agony after having seen the documentary ‘ India’s Daughter‘. It is a documentary i wish for everyone to see, to really know what happened on the fateful day-16th Dec’12. It’s been more than 2 years and yet we in it’s shadow and feel the chill run down our spine. Has justice been served??Has Jyoti, yes i call her by name for the deep sense of respect i have for her and refuse to call her just Nirbhaya, has she got the respect, the peace for having to be chosen to give such a heinous death. I wonder! Am sure there are many who still blame her, for ‘being out there during late hours of the night’ or ‘ for going out with a male friend’ or ‘for the way she dressed’. A scream that never leaves me but wrenches my inside. Tears flow out for the frustration, for the pain and for the reason- we, the women still need to fight for our freedom.

It’s been 67 years since India- The Bharath matha got independence and yet here are all the mothers, daughters, wives, sisters, friends and many more women waiting to be freed. Freedom to say what they think, to wear what they want, to be the way they like to be and not what the society expects to be. Freedom from judgements, from perceptions and this constant thought that they need to be protected. Yes times are changing and there are changes, am not denying it but there still no freedom not completely, not as they say a man or a boy would have. It’s the way each of us have been brought up, the tagged culture and tradition, the reason people like ML Sharma and AP Singh and , have the b**ls to speak what they did. Get a life, i want to tell you guys. Teach your sons and all men you know how to behave and how to be humans and not try to show their power than teaching women where her place is and what she ought to be doing. ‘You are a nobody when you cannot respect a woman!’

I salute the parents of Jyoti – Ashaji and Badriji for having the courage to speak up and for being proud of who your daughter was and how she brought out the light in each one of us. She shall remain immortal in our thoughts, in our hearts, always reminding us of the pain she had to confront. So i ask each one of you out there, how can a monster, though a juvenile be let out for doing such a heinous crime, inspite of being one of the main person in this crime, he ll be let out this Dec’2015 because he is not an adult. Really?? How did this child do such monstrous act? Nothing nothing can justify what he did and he deserves to be Hanged to death like everyone else. Who knows what he does after coming out?or is this a message we send out to all the kids out there. I feel a chill again down my spine. What kind of justice is this??it’s not even justice.

Will everyday be a struggle, struggle against so called society and it’s rules for women, struggle against your voice wanting to be heard, struggle against wanting to be yourself, a struggle for equality. Not saying all men are bad, just saying women are equal-in stature, in voice and deserve equal respect. I would as a small girl, wish to be a guy, only for the reason of freedom, freedom to roam, go out anytime of the day, to wear clothes not to cover things, to not be afraid of the lingering eyes and sometimes hands. Today i say i am proud of who i am- a woman, i am proud to be the way i am to be the proud daughter of my parents and a proud sister to my brother. I am someone who instils respect and who isn’t afraid to be and do what i wish too. I am proud i am a good friend and i ll be a mother to nurture children and their minds and i promise to myself, i shall teach my son to respect and treat a gal/woman better and as equal and i shall teach my daughter, she is no less than anyone and is as free as a bird and teach her to look after herself first before anything.

I start today. I break free and urge everyone else to do so too-men and women, from social obligations, from societal pressures, from oppression and demand respect, equality with no judgements. We are all in this together! Jyoti- justice will be served, you shall be the reason to a new light in every women and help others in ways even we may not fathom.

Watch the documentary- India’ Daughter

The joy of happines

Happiness is something that everybody seeks in their own way. Yes happiness is not going to be always there but it can constantly be there which is in your hands. Isnt everyone working for this day in and day out? TO be happy…to make someone happy which would in turn make them happy. Choosing a way, a path that would ultimately lead to happiness. Yet we are soo afraid to accept this, to aceept its happiness that we seek. Is it because people will feel you are selfish? Won’t people come up with something or the other anyways?

Its okay to want happiness and its okay to seek it. Ultimately it’s the life of happy moments you remember the most and would be a content soul when it’s time for you to leave behind this world. Am not saying other feelings aren’t important but what am really saying is embrace happiness, embrace the tiny joys of life, may it be seeing a loved one or having your favourite chochlate, whether it’s hugging your kid or telling your husband or parents that you love them or the joy of making someone smile, embrace it and do it today.

Don’t wait for happiness to find you, rather you go ahead and find it!

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Its better to let go…….

Friends…the thought of it brings a smile on your face…maybe that’s the first reaction we let our-self have..But have you wondered what a lifelong friendship means??am sure by now we know what a made for eachother love means, but can we get our mind around a friendship that’s lasted a lifetime?right from the start,when you […]

LIVE!!

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Every morning we wake up doing the same routine, following the same things to either begin the day(study or job) and go through the whole day, just like any other day. Here i am in the middle of my one such day..asking myself…or rather telling myself..LIVE!!…but isnt it supposed to be easy..arent we actually doing that…but when you really really ask yourself…you ll know its true…how many days have you really been happy..happy that the day happend or content about the day that went by??how many times have you felt all charged up at the end of a tiresome day, when you have actually done lottsa work but you dont feel any of it because you are happy…now to think of it..am sure its just a few days that you could count or worse, you dont remember when was the last time you felt so.

Now ask yourself, why are you doing all this for??not for responsibilities…dont give that reason…you can fulfill your responsibilities and still be happy…now come on give urself sometime too…and to really think of it..the only way to lead a life..your life is to live it…because that last moment that verry time when you about to die…only your happiness and the way you lived will matter…and then you should never regret on not really doing what you liked..not really enjoying…not really living at the moment…not expressing not loving and hell no..not LIVING..

Soo lets all promise one thing to ourselves…a promise to love yourself and your loved ones…a promise to live every moment…a promise to never regret…..LIVE LOVE LAUGH….

Is professionalism all about dressing up??

ImageDoes being in the best attire make u a professional?? A big NO. It makes you look like a professional but doesn’t make you one. The culture now is all about being well dressed than actually having the values, ethics or the behavioral traits of a professional. Now the question arises of what is or who is a professional??a simple answer to it, the dictionary answer would be anyone attached a profession. Now is that so simple??..it would be great if it was. Professionalism is like a package, its not just the dressing part, its also the mannerisms, ethics, attitude et.al. Everyone now has a wrong notion that looking like one makes you one.

Here’s a funny instance: a client I met through work was pretty, well dressed and carried herself the best and the bubble burst the time she opened her mouth. The fake accent and the fake style oozing out of her was a complete turn off. Here’s the catch, she was well educated, she was in a top position and yet everything else was a dud. She made her point, didn’t understand mine, but yet tried to prove me wrong, like it was a game we were playing and she had to win. And once she was done, she walked away. Now, is that being professional??A big NO NO.

Professionalism is not something you could learn instantaneously and definitely not learnt from academics(may be the basics I agree would be learn @ your institutes), its what you learn, what you inculcate and hone it during the years of work and meeting different people and build traits of your own. There are a few basic rules of it agreed like being polite, punctual, be a listener etc etc., but even this is a combination that would portray you as a professional. So build that in you, don’t just look good, behave like a true professional, because its as easy as being YOU!!